it's cozy right now. puck is in bed (i should probably say "in futon") next to me, and then in the other bed is shinyredtype. we've been in her home all weekend, but now she is finally here. the only sad bit is that marginalia is not over at the kitchen table using her computer. she did that all weekend, sharing shinyredtype's apartment with us.
we spent far too much money on food, as we do. but... i talked to my mom a little, and found out how much she was planning on giving me after selling the house, and it would be as much as i would have gotten from working a job. so i think i'm going to go down there and help her move and then drive across country with her? which has really good (and really horrible) potential.
we are in seattle. did i say that? i love seattle soooooooo much. it feels so good to be here. i wish i could express why. i think it's just things like the way the ground feels beneath my feet. the ways that i know how to get places and love the places i pass in between.
we were here for queering femininity and camp f. i ran back and forth a lot between the two. i started out at the femme conference and felt like it was good and necessary for it to be happening. like i did when the whole thing started. i was like, "omg, a femme conference! this is so fucking necessary!" -- for me and for the laarger community. and it was good to be able to talk about femme identity and to be around other people who were so excited to be able to talk about femme identity. it was really wonderful. it was strange that it was in what felt like an airport, and it was hard when participants referred to "us all" as "women," but it was still just incredible that the space was there.
and then i went up the hill. and i was in this space that had no air conditioning. and there were people sitting on mats, talking to sex workers. and as the time went on and i started to talk to people who'd organized the event and people who were participating, i realized that this space was so exciting. these were people who had taken their power and creativity and intelligence and put it into a new conference in a matter of weeks. these were people who had enough community support to be able to do this. these were people who had harnessed the power to change things and were using it for something fucking amazing. i went to more things at both conferences but wound up gravitating toward camp f, because it just felt more alive. not that the other conference didn't feel alive. there were conversations and essential things happening within people and within the femme community. but this other thing-- it was bigger. i can't express how, past what i already said, but it was.
i'll talk about the conference's effect on me later. once i'm more settled.